Bugs in my Computer
by Don Ford
“Tom, get Bill on the phone. Here’s his number.
“You’re nuts. He’s a computer geek, not a shrink.”
“I don’t need a shrink. I need help getting these bugs out of my computer.”
“Look Jack, when you start telling him you have real bugs in your machine, he’ll tell you to take two migraine tablets and call someone else in the morning.”
“Very funny Tom! I’ll place the call myself.”
“Wait five minutes, after I have left, to place that call.” Tom started leaving.
“Easy, I don’t want to be in the room when you talk to him. I’ll be rolling on the ground laughing as you tell him your story.”
“Have it your way, Tom. Buzz off.”
An hour goes by.........Tom returns!
“Jack, you still in here?” There were no signs of anyone being in the house. Everything looked normal. Little buzzing sounds like bees were heard in the computer itself. Tom decided to put the earphones in and the sounds were more distinct. It wasn’t bees after-all. It was miniature voices calling out to him.
Suddenly on the screen appeared tiny little bug-life figures. When Tom enlarged them, they were Bill and Jack. Tom was startled. How on God’s green Earth did you two get in there?”
“Turn up the sound . “ Jack was insistent.
“What?” (BILL & Jack in the computer - Tom outside, conversing with them.)
“I said turn up the sound.”
“Jack, Is that better?
“Drop it a tad.”
“Yes, that’s great.” By now Jack was smiling.
“Bill is here with me.”
“Yes, I know; that I figured out. How did you both become so small?
“We sprayed each other with bug spray.”
“But Jack, bug spray will kill you, especially at your size.”
“No. This is a special spray for bugs in the computer. It works on people to turn them into bugs too, hence they call it bug...”
“I get it, Jack. Now what did you find out? Did your computer crash?”
“Did you want to talk to Bill? I think you will believe this coming from him.”
“Sure, where is he?” Out, from behind a picture on the screen, came Bill.
“Doubting Thomas or was that Tom? Ha Ha!
“Notice I’m not finding this funny in the least, Bill. You’re the resident computer expert, and that I do find hilarious - you are residing in the computer for sure. Think you will ever find your way back out?”
“That’s why we have you, Tom. But in the mean time we are staying put until we can eliminate these bugs.”
“So, there are more than one”
“Well, as of twenty minutes ago, there were just the two of us and sadly, there are hundreds more.”
“So Bill and Jack, they are just viruses, right?”
“Tom, I’m sorry to inform you that hundreds are born every few minutes; call them viruses or bugs.”
“The big question is this, are they virtual, or are they what we have dreaded would some day occur?”
“Whatever they are, they can outsmart us. They know our every move, before we make them. We also know they hate heat and bright light. So, this will be our next move. We have to stop the multiplying of them.”