After reading personal ads I wondered how people ever found each other after wading about, and before I knew it I had put pen in hand and wrote how I think my ad should read.
Looking for LTR. Must be tall enough to see over toadstools. Good hygiene a must – therefore must be willing to clip nose and ear hair (or at least neatly braid it), and be diligent about brushing teeth or tooth.
As I am excellent at keeping my balance while riding my broom in gales or hurricanes, I expect my prospective mate to be able to maintain their balance as well.
Prince Charmings need not apply. They tend to look in the mirror too much, constantly fluff their flowing hair, admire their own voice so much they can’t hear anyone else, plus they tend to have small feet.
If you have been in prison, jail, or a dungeon please do not reply.