When You Were Gone ~ for Gather Writing...

Comments: 34

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ Apr 29, 2012, 8:43am UTC

What i like so much about your piece is how anyone can personalize it to their particular circumstance. It is universal and personal simultaneously.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 8:57am UTC

Thank you, Michelle.

Doug Westberg Apr 29, 2012, 1:23pm UTC

That's what good poetry does!

JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ Apr 29, 2012, 1:26pm UTC

Agreed.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 7:02pm UTC

Thank you both.

reply to this comment

Marilyn (PaintsOnSlate) S. Apr 29, 2012, 12:03pm UTC

That's very interesting. Both sad and then happy again.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:48pm UTC

Thanks, Marilyn.

reply to this comment

Angie O. Apr 29, 2012, 12:35pm UTC

This draws you in from the first line and love happy endings. Beautiful.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:49pm UTC

Thanks, Angie.

reply to this comment

Sonia M. Apr 29, 2012, 12:51pm UTC

Perfect sample of the prompts...

I sort of remember an old cartoon about a rooster named Chanticleer...he spoke Italian...
;-)

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:49pm UTC

I know the name has been associated with roosters in literature, Sonia. Thanks.

reply to this comment

Patricia J. Apr 29, 2012, 12:53pm UTC

This is a wonderful piece, John, first sad, then happy it could be a day a week or a year!!

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:50pm UTC

Thanks, Patricia.

reply to this comment

Doug Westberg Apr 29, 2012, 1:22pm UTC

The prompts are Letter Narration and/or Personification
This brief piece shows both, plus both simile and metaphor.
And that, of course is the idea, isn't it, to have all these things in your tool belt; but you know that. This is lovely. Thanks for sharing with (Sunday) Gather Writing Essential!

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:51pm UTC

Thanks, Doug. I know it's minimalist, but I wanted to show the tools.

reply to this comment

Richard Lynn Livesay Apr 29, 2012, 2:05pm UTC

...and the sun smiles again"...a touch of genius

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:51pm UTC

Thanks, Richard.

reply to this comment

Barbary Chaapel Apr 29, 2012, 2:41pm UTC

Very,very good, my friend.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:51pm UTC

Thank you, Barbary.

reply to this comment

A. F. Stewart Apr 29, 2012, 3:01pm UTC

Sad and then sweet , but always wonderful.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:51pm UTC

Thanks, Anita.

reply to this comment

Alison H. Apr 29, 2012, 3:09pm UTC

Poignant, and beautifully penned.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:52pm UTC

Thank you, Alison.

reply to this comment

Peter Joseph Swanson Apr 29, 2012, 3:40pm UTC

Sad yet delightful! Full of hope ...

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:52pm UTC

Thanks, Peter.

reply to this comment

Allen H. Apr 29, 2012, 4:11pm UTC

I go into Monk mode when my wife is away...

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 6:53pm UTC

:) Thanks, Allen.

reply to this comment

elizabeth evans Apr 29, 2012, 8:37pm UTC

Well done...fine examples.

JOHN BECK Apr 29, 2012, 9:12pm UTC

Thank you, Bob.

reply to this comment

William Dotani Apr 30, 2012, 4:05am UTC

Your metaphor is broad enough to fit a situational level for dealing with any type of minor to major personal loss of probably person, but could also include pets or objects. This has somewhat of a lilt to me when reading. Quite enjoyable verse.

JOHN BECK Apr 30, 2012, 7:27am UTC

Thank you, Bill.

William Dotani May 4, 2012, 3:38am UTC

Now, I see it is having your wife go away and leave you alone. I know the feeling.

reply to this comment

Pam Brittain Apr 30, 2012, 9:26pm UTC

Sniff. I always cry at bitter sweet stuff.

JOHN BECK Apr 30, 2012, 11:43pm UTC

But your tears were short-lived, I'm sure.

Thanks, Pam.

reply to this comment

When You Were Gone ~ for Gather Writing Essential SunWE

16 people recommend this post

Comments: 34

Join the Conversation