by Kimberly Blackadar
Member since:
October 8, 2009

"The Awakening" (Monday Writing Essential)

April 14, 2011 08:51 AM UTC
views: 0 | 14 people recommend this | comments: 41

“The Awakening*”

a cross-over country song 

 

[V1]

Little girl listens to fairy tales

And wonders when it all begins

Pretty dresses, perfect prince

Happily ever after—the end

 

[V2]

The same girl waits for true love

Imagines the kisses she’ll get

The first time only takes minutes

With lots of years to regret

 

[Pre-C]

Oh, then she wakes up

And it’s all a dream

Not what love is at all

She has to fall

For what’s inside

After all--

 

[Chorus]

After all the bedtime stories,

Romance novels and absent glories

After all the lifetime lessons,

Broken hearts, and soul confessions

After all the sheltered dreams

Pain, sadness, and tragedy

That’s when true love begins

From within her awakening

 

[V3]

The dutiful wife gives up on love

And finds somethin’ in another’s arms

What begins as excitement turns to

Indictment, causing everyone harm

 

[Pre-C]

Oh, then she wakes up

And it’s all a dream

Not what love is at all

She has to fall

For what’s inside

After all--

 

Wake up, girls, and wake up, wives

And listen to me now

The awakening all begins

The moment we realize—

We have to fall deep in love

With what’s inside—

After all…

 

[Chorus]

After all the bedtime stories,

Romance novels and absent glories

After all the lifetime lessons,

Broken hearts, and soul confessions

After all the sheltered dreams

Pain, sadness, and tragedy

That’s when true love begins

From within her awakening

 

[Outro]

Fall deep in love with what’s inside

With what’s inside

With what’s inside

After all…

 

*The title, an allusion to Kate Chopin’s famed novel, yet the content was inspired by a freewrite on my friend’s blog.

 

Today's Challenge:

For poets: write lyrics to a country ballad.
For fiction writers: write a story based on a country music theme.

 

  • Post your article to Gather Writing Essentials.
  • Tag your submission with MWE.
  • Tag your submission with "Country".
  • Include "Monday Writing Essential" in your title.

 

 

Kimberly Blackadar, former teacher and now author of Nothing but Trouble after Midnight, writes teen fiction and speaks to schools across the nation about reading and the writing process. Connect with Kimberly on her Facebook fan page and her blog.

 

Comments: 41

JOHN BECK Apr 14, 2011, 8:55am UTC
Wisdom wrapped in a ballad. I like it.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 8:58am UTC
Thank you, John. The pre-chorus is very cliche, but it's stuck in my head and I can't write over it...yet.
JOHN BECK Apr 14, 2011, 9:04am UTC
It works!
Greg Schiller Apr 14, 2011, 9:11am UTC
The reason a phrase become a cliche - is because it works.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 9:15am UTC
Thank you both for reassuring me. Now I can put the song to rest...so to speak.
lynn a. Apr 14, 2011, 9:09am UTC
A lot of truth to this.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 9:16am UTC
Thank you, Lynn. I was inspired by my friend's post and wanted to address her feelings in a song.
Greg Schiller Apr 14, 2011, 9:17am UTC
Your rhythm and themes are almost perfect for a country ballad - but it is the arc that fits the best. Sadly, country rarely gives the human spirit a way-out like you do.

Well done.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 9:19am UTC
Thank you, Greg. I am noticing a change in country music--especially in ballads aimed at women--providing hope rather than a sad ending.
Priya P. Apr 14, 2011, 12:44pm UTC
ok, now who do we find to sing this, Faith, LeeAnn, ..... :) Great lyrics.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 1:07pm UTC
Here is my answer to your question: Lindsey Kelly.

She's my best friend. :)

Thanks for reading and commenting, Priya.
stephen berwaldt Apr 14, 2011, 5:01pm UTC
Beautiful lyrics...but not one mention of a pickup truck or a dead dog, or cheatin' anything... :)
A new genre of Country-Western...
Thank you, kimberly...very nice...

Thank you posting to the Triple Name Club.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 5:23pm UTC
Thanks, Stephen.

You know what happens when you play country music backwards, right? You get your wife, your dog, and your job back.
Angela A. Apr 14, 2011, 5:43pm UTC
As they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So, pure beauty comes from ones soul.
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Make your own banner at MyBannerMaker.com!
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 6:47pm UTC
I agree, Angela. :)
A. F. Stewart Apr 14, 2011, 6:33pm UTC
Phenomenally great.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 6:48pm UTC
Why, thank you, A.F. I was trying to get caught up on GWE posts today. I've been preoccupied with poetry lately.
JustMe ~I'm happy to be~ Apr 14, 2011, 6:47pm UTC
Amen!
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 6:49pm UTC
Thanks, Michelle. :)
Larry H. Apr 14, 2011, 11:10pm UTC
thanks for sharing your song
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 14, 2011, 11:29pm UTC
Thanks for reading, Larry.
Elsie Duggan Apr 15, 2011, 1:14am UTC
Wonderful Kimberly and so much truth in it, fall in love with what's inside, the only part that counts, love, Elsie
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 15, 2011, 1:18am UTC
Thank you, Elsie. We are both up late.

I started staring at the fish, hoping he would let me know what to write for the MP prompt. He wasn't any help. I think I'll have to sleep on it. :)
Elsie Duggan Apr 15, 2011, 1:24am UTC
I think I'm going to sleep on this one too, gosh for more inspirational pictures, wouldn't that be nice, what can you write about a black fish sitting quiet, going to have to stir things up, and I just come on every night at this time, I go to bed about four AM, do most of my writing then, love, Elsie
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 15, 2011, 1:30am UTC
I'm betting you can make this fish come alive, Elsie. He'll be singing a new tune when you're done with him. :)
Elsie Duggan Apr 15, 2011, 1:43am UTC
thinking on it:)
Tracy Fabre Apr 16, 2011, 5:11pm UTC
So when can we see this on CMT?
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 16, 2011, 5:48pm UTC
I reckon' this post might be the highlight of this song's life. :)
Len Maxwell Apr 16, 2011, 5:58pm UTC
Geez, not just a writer and poet, but also a lyricist. What are you going to do next? An opera?

Excellently done.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 16, 2011, 6:15pm UTC
A query letter--which I am awful at writing. :(

And thank you, Len. I'm assuming you did not write any lyrics...too much like poetry, right?
Len Maxwell Apr 16, 2011, 6:39pm UTC
Query letters are nothing for a writer such as you. Think of it as a writing assignment: you have a beginning, middle, and end. You only have to plan what goes in each part. Would it be worthwhile to put that up as a challenge?

Nope, never done any lyrics. I always equated them to poetry, but Ruthi once told me that she couldn't write lyrics. She saw some major difference between the two.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 16, 2011, 11:09pm UTC
Yes, Len, I need it to be a challenge. If you assign it, I will do it! I have to perfect the query, write the synopsis, and have the first 40 pages ready for review. What's my deadline, Mr. Maxwell?

The forms are somewhat different, but I have friends who write both. To me, writing lyrics is like learning another form of poetry. Songs are pretty formulaic.
Len Maxwell Apr 17, 2011, 5:18pm UTC
You know I try not to let anyone know what I'm going to do in my challenges, so it would be self-defeating to say that I've started writing a challenge for next Saturday that deals with query letters.
Lynn P. Apr 18, 2011, 1:42pm UTC
Kimberly, from my experience writing cover letters for resume clients, I also recommend a beginning that hooks them, too. I don't know if the idea is common in the publishing field, but it strikes me that, of all people, publishers and agents ought to appreciate a hook at the beginning of a query letter the most. ;)
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 18, 2011, 1:57pm UTC
I'm not sure what they want, but I'll be finding out. :)
Lynn P. Apr 18, 2011, 1:44pm UTC
Does this include a melody in your head, too? The closest thing to musical ability I have is playing the radio. Still, I get this sense there already is music in this.

Nicely done, and from an old lady married a good number of years to my knight in shiny armor - amen!
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 19, 2011, 9:49pm UTC
To "an old lady married a good number of years to my knight in shiny armor,"

There is a tune in my head. I tend to have simple melodies, but when no one is around, I'll sing my own songs. The song in my book has been sung many times. I did the scratch demo, but I don't have it on the 'Net.

From a lady who is blessed with ten years of marriage and praying for a lifetime with the same guy.
dee b. Apr 18, 2011, 7:56pm UTC
Marvelous! A tune with good advice.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 19, 2011, 9:51pm UTC
Thank you, Dee. It sounded a bit like preaching, but it was fun to write. :)
Allen H. Apr 19, 2011, 7:09am UTC
After all…has been seen and done,
we have seen this was done well.
Kimberly Blackadar Apr 19, 2011, 9:52pm UTC
Thank you, Allen. Greg gave a really good challenge. These GWE editors keep us thinking, huh? I am still in awe of your SatWE. Bravo!

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