Waiting. I am always waiting. As much as I try, as much as I profess to live in the moment, the truth is, I am waiting.
Waiting for the bread to finish baking.
Waiting for my child to get on the morning bus.
Waiting for warmer biking weather.
Waiting for an acceptance letter for my latest submission.
I file my waiting thoughts deep in my mind. I tout the joys of Zen Living, which supposedly is being present, living in the here-and-now. I believe in that philosophy, but does anyone really live that way?
Actually, yes. I believe babies live in the moment. They have very little concept of Time so that they can do little else than live in the present. And I believe people with cognitive impairments also might live in the present as they cannot do otherwise. Their sense of Time is limited. I don't know who those people are, though. I wouldn't presume to label anyone like that, either. I just think those people exist.
The advantages of living in the present include helping one to be more attentive to others, helping one to savor the moment, helping one to be free of worry or procrastination because the future is out there and not something that intrudes on the present.
The advantages of NOT living in the present include mentally removing oneself from the drudgery of the present, emotionally removing oneself from an experience one perceives as unpleasant, and building elaborate plans for the future.
I'm not being facetious here. It's true. Sometimes living in the present moment stinks. A few years ago when I had some nodes of my thyroid biopsied, I put on headphones and mentally whisked myself away to a BeauSoleil concert so that I didn't have to think about the five-inch long needle stuck into my neck.
But what about when I'm engaged in a difficult conversation with a loved one. It's tempting, but not helpful, to zone out to some imagined music. However, if I frequently channel my thoughts elsewhere, the habit is strengthened and refined, making the mental action more automatic. How much better, in the long run, to remain rooted in the present.
A lot of people have trouble with worry. Worry is another way of not living in the present. Worry often involves thinking about the future and the myriad ways that the future can go awry. Staying attuned to reality helps to relegate thoughts/worry of the future to where they belong: in the future.
Procrastination is the other side of the worry coin. I won't worry about the future, but I'll keep ignoring it, putting it off, dawdling so that I don't have to face it. Life is more managable if I push it forward so that it doesn't exist for me in the present.
These habits destroy your dreams.
Last week I said I was going to require Resolutions from you. Here I am talking about Living in the Moment. Or not living in the moment because of worry or procrastination.
Here's the deal. You can write all the resolutions you want. You can set all the goals you possibly can set. But if you're going to worry about them, if you're going to procrastinate doing them, you've lost.
Face it.
Live in the moment.
Set your goals.
Make your plans.
Succeed.
What are you waiting for?
In the comment section, share one of your goals and the first step you will take to reach your goal. Tell us, also, the deadline you've set for yourself in accomplishing that first step.
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 I had fun reading the gwwe submissions for this last prompt. If you hover for a bit over my links to the posts below, you'll see a brief critique, which I hope will reel you in to reading it for yourself. I've also discovered this evening that tags are disappearing from posts. If you write a post, but then go and edit it, the tags might not re-publish with the rest of the post. Hence, I might have missed some of your submissions. I apologize for that. Please let me know if that happens to you.
I'd Cut My Ear Off for This by Elsie Duggan (last week's prompt)
The Dance by Becca J.
A Moment in Time by Abbie H.
I'll Have More of That by Elsie Duggan
Da Sticks to It by Susan Budig
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Prompts for January 5, 2011
- Use a quote from a book. Make your attribution like this one.
- Include the words: whippersnapper, tough bounce, & charming
- Someone needs to say, "Love is..." you can fill in the rest of the sentence
- tag with gwwe
- publish by January 11 for inclusion in next week's column
"100% of the shots you don't take don't go in." Wayne Gretzky
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Comments: 78
I have just read this prompt after putting up my poem of the month for mindful poetry, and I think I tell how I feel there. the new prompt here sounds like a bit of fun, love, Elsie
As far as babies are concerned, they are in the present only when they feel hungry, or some other problems. At other times one can see them vigorously moving their hands and legs, as if chasing someone, or changing facial expressions in their sleep, as if communicating with someone from the past. No one really knows what they are thinking!
I like that Gretzky quote.
My goal: To be here. Often, in the moment. And not worry. And do treadmill.
And what have I done so far? Treadmill.
Here's a novel idea: what if Camus and Zen had a love child? Then, we no longer live in a world of black or white, good or bad. We live in a world of many clines and colors, vast varieties, a cornucopia of thoughts, ideas, behaviors none bad or good, merely different.
It's the gut root of our Darwinian-driven reptilian brain that infects us with dualistic thinking. I have suggested if the goal is truly to live in the moment, if the goal is to separate from the corruption/illusion of the material world, if the goal is to be free of worry of the future, then the solution is simple.
Get a full frontal lobotomy.
For me, it's not a matter of living in the moment. It's a matter of choosing to enjoy the moment I'm in.
A bit of wisdom from Fast times at Ridgemont High:
Mike Damone: "... act like wherever you are, that's the place to be. 'Isn't this great?'"
I amaze myself by what I find to do, when I should be doing something else.
Great advice, Kasey. The key is choosing to enjoy the moment rather than trying to convince ourselves why we should be enjoying the moment. I'm trying to practice mindful meditation and failing and I'm finding it difficult to believe I'm not failing at it but just not very practiced at it yet.
Anyway, I thought this was a good column and I liked this part:
Worry is another way of not living in the present. Worry often involves thinking about the future and the myriad ways that the future can go awry. Staying attuned to reality helps to relegate thoughts/worry of the future to where they belong: in the future.
I'm a worrier and for me, when I start getting into worrying about the future, I try and stop it by telling myself I'll worry about it when the time comes, or I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Sometimes the 'yeah, but's' are too powerful for that to work but sometimes they're not.
Did you go to their concerts? I wasn't much of a punker although I did have my hair sheared on one side and long-ish on the other and once I dyed a V into the back of it.
Fun story you shared, Tina. :-)
I was a huge, huge Prince and the Purple Rain fan--yes, I know his band was The Revolution, but the album, Purple Rain, was one of my favorites.
It just worked in my hair that was cut into two different lengths.
Thanks for submitting to
The Surreal Circus.
A man came up to me in a bookstore and said, "That's a pretty provocative button you're wearing."
I was confused by what he meant until years later. I tend to be very naive. ^_^
Have you done so? ;-)
That could be the title of a poem. ;-)
I need to respond to this myself! One of my new goals is to develop my business, Mindful Poetry. At present, it is stagnant and exists only as a single page on the Web. My first step is to contact a potential mentor who works over in St. Paul at my alma mater, St. Catherine University. My first step, then, is to call or email her. I have both her phone number and email address.
;-)
Do you post your work on Gather?
That's a concept worth pondering.
1) When parents, and siblings, "scream", or "lecture", a person about their "real
life" responsibilities, with such phrases as: "Sure, you MIGHT be a distinguished
author ONE day, or SOMEday, but get real! Rent, Food, clothing, paying your bills,
RIGHT NOW so you dont wind up in the poor-house. This is whats "REAL', in life. Get your head
out of the clouds, get a REAL job, then "fiddle" with your hobby, in your spare time"
THIS is why I never dared publish, while young in my twenties. I was told "Writing
is NOT REAL. If you want to pretend, do it AFTER work".
2) As for the mentally disabled, I lived are many of them, for 17 years, in a high rise,
and I can tell you that most of these people are only able to grasp meal time,
bath time, and cartoons. You must speak to the mentally disabled people like
you would, to a pre-school child. These are the only discussions which these
people are able to understand. Even questions like "What do you want for
dinner", are beyond the mentally disableds ability to grasp.
Having written this, I should make it VERY clear that there is a differnce between
Mental disability, and PHYSICAL, disability. I can list many names, of physically
disabled people, who have gone on to earned advanced (Masters and Doctorate)
degrees, in a wide variety of fields.
Few of their families, though, have ever been supportive, since they remind the
disabled, frequently, not to risk failure. (Too many families treat disabled people
like children, to be protected from life.) For the physically disabled, life is about
finding out "What CAN I do!", and "So what, even if I fail, atleast I TRIED".
Sorry for being so "preachy". Your WAS a VERY GOOD post, Susan.
I am the first to acknowledge that in some ways it is easier for a woman to pick up writing than a man. As a stay-at-home mom, I am not the main breadwinner. I probably earn enough for the jam on the bread. ;-)
But I certainly heard similar words as you did. "Why don't you get a job like your cousin?" "I'll ask the writer in your family" (and then my husband was asked. He will certainly admit that my creative writing skills exceed his although he was an English major at Carleton College in Northfield. He's no slouch. :-)
All that is history for me. Sometimes I still chafe at the memory, but usually I let it go.
I would like to know more about how men and women start up as writers in the creative field.
Have a good evening.
1. Live in the moment. - not in the past or in the future - there is only now.
2. Set your goals. These would be in the future, so ruled out by 1.
3. Make your plans. There is only do or not do - there is no plan in the now.
4. Succeed. If you are living in the now, you have succeeded, or more accurately are in success mode in the now.
Only by having no ambitions, no plans, no goals, can one live 100% "in the moment."
Humans are aspirational, and therefore spend most of their time planning for the future, or less usefully, rehashing the past! Animals live in the moment without conscious effort, precisely because they are not conscious.
I see your points. Give me time to refute them. ^_^
rather than evidence that animals are self-aware
and understand the concepts of past and future!
Dogs are great friends because they adopt their owner
as leader of their pack!
No need to refute my points -
I was just responding with my reactions
to your thought-provoking post!
Thanks for giving my brain a run!
But for me, more importantly, I believe we are both past and present in the one moment.
conditioned responses to repeated stimuli.
I've owned and worked with dogs
they do appear to have individual personalities,
but they are not persons in the sense that
they understand past, present and future
and comprehend awareness of their own self
and of our and their own mortality!
A religious person would say they have no souls,
and anyone who knows animals, also knows
there is a spark that the meanest person has,
that they do not. I say this as someone
who likes animals, and whom is liked by animals.
Sorry if my comments upset you.
I think that if you can demonstrate to an editor or publisher that you are marketable, readable, and serious you'll have more success with finding a publishing house.
So I'd suggest magazines such as Glimmer Train or the fiction contest at Minnesota Monthly.
Also, maybe take a small section, use my gwwe prompts and submit it here. You might be surprised at the comments. Tell readers that you want critical feedback so that they feel comfortable giving their opinions.
You Can View It HERE.
Congratulations!
My goal for the year!!! To hide as much as I can from my son who is coming home in February. He wants me to rush through the necessary throw away sessions we all must have from time to time. And for me it's quite a big ask. I will do it but I want to plod and cherish. It's gonna be a major.
Interesting. When I don't have a deadline, whatever it is never seems to get done. I told this to my editors at the newspapers and lo they found it to be true. If they want to see the article, they tell me a date.
As for cognitive impairments giving us permenent now moments, that would have to be one specific impairment. My Dad, hubby, and I all have cognitive impairments, and we are all great at NOT living in the moment. Then again, I agree with you with the disadvantages of living in the moment, so I reserve living in the moment for those times when it's well worth it (getting married, family get-togethers, vacations, and the like.) All in all, my next moment has to do with keeping the laudry going to fold it later. That's not a Noe Moment interesting enough to keep me in the now.
Goals? Cool! Much easier than "resolutions." My goal this year is to finish writing my book. (Not to be confused with finish revising it, re-revising it, editing it, editing it again, revising some more, editing it some more, and finally getting it out the door to be published. Those are mostly next year's goals.)
Did it just for fun.
And stay focus as you work your resolutions. :-)