Dateline: September 7, 2014
In a statement give by the Department of Orbital Research and Keynote Sciences, we now have proof of extra-terrestrial life on our planet. Shockingly, evidence has been found that proves they've been on our planet longer than man himself.
Early yesterday morning, department director Nathan Bigglesworth III, met with reporters on the latest finds. According to the soil and rock samples brought back from the latest Mars mission, insects of various breeds were living on Mars millions of years before man first walked on the earth. Most of the rock samples held fossilized remnants of several species of insect, including dragonflies, ladybugs, and cockroaches. Amazingly, these species were 3 to 5 times larger than their Earthly descendants. Also, color variations of these insects were quite different than we see today. According to Dr. Angela D. Messersmith, lead scientist of D.O.R.K.S., the variety of ladybugs were purple with silver and gold spots, the dragonflies had twelve sets of wings, and the cockroaches had fangs much like the common vipers of today.
Dr. Bigglesworth theorizes that at some point, a comet impacted with Mars, spewing tons of the planets flora and fauna into the cosmos. With the speed of the impact and the universal winds, the insects and some plant life landed on the earth. He also theorizes that most of the insects were caught up in the icy tail of the comet, placing them in a sort of cryogenic state. The heat from volcanic activity on Earth at that time warmed these insects back into life. Once on this planet, the insects began to morph into the species we know today.
The scientists at D.O.R.K.S. are also studying some of our plant life, comparing known varieties, both current and extinct, with fossils brought back from the mission. Though nothing has been proven, scientists believe that plants such as pine trees, rose bushes, and what we know as the hollyhock, are all forms of Martian plant life. Dr. Bigglesworth told the press that as soon as he and his team complete their tests, they will be holding another press conference.
As we continue to seek out life in our galaxy, we now know that we may not have to look any further than our own backyards to find a cosmic windfall of alien life. Will we ever find a life form we can communicate with? Maybe. But until then, we’ll all have to rely on D.O.R.K.S. for all our inter-stellar information.
Reporting for Global Cable Access News, I’m Christine Senter.